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on September 2, 2013 on 11:57 pm
But, but……you can’t make factual commnets about anyone who has had the tip of the tar brush dipped into their gene pool, but about whiteys you can say what you like with total disregard of the truth. Michelle Obama has a fat arse, and she is a liar and a thief…….and I remember seeing her in the original Planet of the Apes.
I think after reading this I kind of understand those words which seemed to characterise you after a month together, because I, too, have nothing left to say but… Allahu Akbar!And I think I also understand why Allah chose such a name for you – Ibrahim! I see many parallels already and may Allah increase you in likeness to our beloved Ibrahim (a.s.), the grandfather of our beloved Muhammad (pbuh)! Although I accept it as fact, it seems almost fairy tale how events culminated to your Shahadah just before your 23rd birthday! Allahu Akbar.“And who could be of better faith than he who surrenders his whole being unto God and is a doer of good withal, and follows the creed of Abraham, who turned away from all that is false -seeing that God exalted Abraham with His love?” 4:125
So many good points!I agree that it is esatseinl that people be compatible in their levels of desire. I was stunned when I read (can’t remember where ) that roughly 1/3 of people desire sex 3 or more times per week, 1/3 once a month, and 1/3 once a year or less. Where are all these over-sexed stories coming from if 2/3 of the population is once-a-month or less? Dare I say Hollywood?Self-soothing is certainly not the same as when I’m able to bury myself in my lover’s soul. And, as you said, there’s a way to get there that engages my lover’s desire (slow romantic foreplay is a luscious example.)The deepest issue I saw in this scenario was that both of them were engaging in a drama that said she needed to take care of his needs for him. That is the essence of codependence. I refer back to section 9 of for this one:It is my intention to practice self care and self responsibility, and allow others to do the same.■I maintain a safe space for myself. I take care of and honor the wisdom of my body, heart, mind, and source of inspiration, allowing them to guide me.■I empower others by allowing them to take care of themselves.She could not honor his needs without dishonoring her own, so it was best for her to refrain. (See )Also, the last line of section 9 is extremely powerful, at least for me. The first time I read it, I felt like I’d found the key to my Universe. I’d taken care of others (raging codependent) for so long. It had never occurred to me to let someone else take care of themselves. Believe me, many relationships disintegrated when I started practicing allowing others to take care of themselves. They didn’t want to take responsiblity for themselves, their needs, their lives, or anything else. They left me! Abandoned though I was, they took their drama with them. It worked out well in the end.And, you’re right, it’s complicated, and we weren’t there. Even if we were, we’d have a different perspective. There is no one-size-fits-all solution. We are each on a path, travelling along, either consciously or not. I am my own best expert in my life; I’m the only one who’s been here the whole time. Same is true for you, them, and everyone else. Tuning in to find that answer ah! That is PEACE! Maybe that one does fit all?Oh, and as to your probable reaction in your 20 s sometimes I still do that. Just because I know better doesn’t mean I always do better. I’m learning growing. I still get my feelings hurt; I just remember who’s responsible for my feelings a lot faster than I used to.